|The ancient and eternal arms race.........|
IN THE BEGINNING .... God created the heavens and the Earth. And the
was void and without form, and darkness was upon the face of the deep.
said, "Let there be light," and there was light. And God said,"Let the
earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree
yielding fruit," and God saw that it was good.
And Satan said, "It doesn't get any better than this."
And God said, "Let us make Man in our image, and God looked upon Man
Woman and saw that they were lean and fit. And God populated the earth
broccoli and cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow vegetables of
kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.
And Satan created McDonald's. And McDonald's brought forth the 99-cent
double cheeseburger. And Satan said to Man, "You want fries with that?"
And Man said, "Supersize them." And Man gained 5 pounds.
And God created the healthful yogurt, that woman might keep her figure
man found so fair.
And Satan brought forth chocolate. And Woman gained 5 pounds.
And God said, "Try my crispy fresh salad."
And Satan brought forth Ben and Jerry's. And Woman gained 10 pounds.
And God said, "I have sent thee heart-healthy vegetables and olive oil
with which to cook them."
And Satan brought forth chicken fried steak so big it needed its own
platter. And Man gained 10 pounds and his bad cholesterol went through
And God brought forth running shoes and Man resolved to lose those
And Satan brought forth cable TV with remote control so Man would not
to toil to change channels between ESPN and ESPN2. And Man gained
And God brought forth the potato, a vegetable naturally low in fat and
brimming with nutrition.
And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center
chips and deep-fat fried them. And he created sour cream dip also. And
clutched his remote control and ate the potato chips swaddled in
cholesterol. And Satan saw and said, "It is good." And Man went into
God sighed, and created quadruple bypass surgery.
And Satan created HMO's.
This joke is from the collection at www.usaone.net/jokenet