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UsaONE Joke net

Title:   Insight


"Computers in the future may weigh no more than 15 tons."

--"Popular Mechanics,"
forecasting the relentless march of science, 1949.

----------------------------------------------------

"I think there is a world market for maybe five computers."

--Thomas Watson,
chairman of IBM, 1943.

----------------------------------------------------

"I have traveled the length and breadth of this country...
and talked with the best people, and I can assure you that data
processing is a fad that won't last out the year."

--The editor in charge of business books for
Prentice Hall, 1957.

------------------------------------------------------

"But what...is it good for ?"

-- Engineer at the Advanced Computing Systems Division
of IBM commenting on the microchip, 1968.

------------------------------------------------------

"There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home."

--Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder
of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977

---------------------------------------------------

"This 'telephone' has too many shortcomings to be seriously
considered as a means of communication. The device is inherently of
no value to us."
-- Western Union internal memo, 1876.

-----------------------------------------------------

"The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value.
Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular ?"

-- David Sarnoff's associates (NBC) in response
to his urgings for investment in the radio in
the 1920s.

---------------------------------------------------

"The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn
better than a 'C,' the idea must be feasible."

-- A Yale University management professor
in response to Fred Smith's paper
proposing reliable overnight delivery service.
(Smith went on to found Federal
Express Corp.)

-----------------------------------------------------

"Who the hell wants to hear actors talk ?"

-- Harry M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927.

-------------------------------------------------------

"I'm just glad it'll be Clark Gable who's falling on his face
and not Gary Cooper."

--Gary Cooper on his decision not to take the
leading role in "Gone with the Wind."

-------------------------------------------------------

"A cookie store is a bad idea. Besides, the market research
reports say America likes crispy cookies, not soft and chewy cookies
like you make."

-- Response to Debbi Fields' idea of starting her
company, Mrs. Fields' Cookies.

----------------------------------------------------

"We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out."

-- Decca Recording Co. rejecting the Beatles, 1962.

------------------------------------------------------

"Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible."

--Lord Kelvin, president, Royal Society, 1895.

-----------------------------------------------------

"If I had thought about it, I wouldn't have done the experiment.
The literature was full of examples that said you can't do this."

-- Spencer Silver, on the work that led to nthe
unique adhesives on 3-M "Post-It" Notepads.

---------------------------------------------------------

"So we went to Atari and said, 'Hey, we've got this amazing thing,
even built with some of your parts, and what do you think about
funding us ? Or we'll give it to you. We just want to do it.
Pay our salary, we'll come work for you.' And they said, 'No.'
So then we went to Hewlett- Packard, and they said, 'Hey, we don't
need you; you haven't got through college yet.'"

--Apple Computer Inc. founder Steve Jobs
on attempts to get Atari and H-P
interested
in his and Steve Wozniak's personal
computer.

-------------------------------------------------------

"Professor Goddard does not know the relation between action and
reaction... and the need to have something better than a vacuum
against which to react. He seems to lack the basic knowledge ladled
out daily in high schools."

-- New York Times editorial about
Robert Goddard's revolutionary rocket
work, 1921.

------------------------------------------------------

"You want to have consistent and uniform muscle development
across all of your muscles ? It can't be done. It's just a fact
of life. You just have to accept inconsistent muscle development
as an unalterable condition of weight training."

-- Response to Arthur Jones, who solved
the "unsolvable" problem by inventing
Nautilus.

-------------------------------------------------------

"Drill for oil ? You mean drill into the ground to try and find
oil ? You're crazy."

-- Drillers who Edwin L. Drake tried to enlist to
his project to drill for oil in 1859.

------------------------------------------------------

"Stocks have reached what looks like a permanently high plateau."

-- Irving Fisher, Professor of Economics,
Yale University, 1929.

---------------------------------------------------------

"Airplanes are interesting toys but of no military value."

-- Marechal Ferdinand Foch, Professor of
Strategy, Ecole Superieure de Guerre.

--------------------------------------------------------

"Everything that can be invented has been invented."

-- Charles H. Duell,
Commissioner, U.S. Office of Patents, 1899.

------------------------------------------------------
"Louis Pasteur's theory of germs is ridiculous fiction."

--Pierre Pachet,
Professor of Physiology at Toulouse, 1872.

---------------------------------------------------------

"The abdomen, the chest and the brain will forever be shut from
the intrusion of the wise and humane surgeon."

--Sir John Eric Ericksen, British surgeon,
appointed Surgeon-Extraordinary to Queen Victoria,
1873.

---------------------------------------------------------

蝐k ought to be enough for anybody." -- Bill Gates, 1981

---------------------------------------------------------

This joke is from the collection at www.usaone.net/jokenet


joke number 64   Current Rating 10


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