•Dog Food
•The Afghan Quarterback
•little Pill
•The Haircut
• DOG OF A ...
•Counseling
•As men age
•Exercise
•Employment Policy
•Jenny
•Marriage Humor 2
•Marriage Humor
•Pest Control
•Senility
•Brothel Trip
•Confession3
•Confession2
•Confession
•IRS Followup
•Hostess Bakery
•Invasion
•A Nun at Hooters
•The Mexican maid
•Cowboy Headstone
•blonde suicide
•Real laws of nature
•The man and the ostrich
•Newspaper
•Homeless Mans Funeral
•Adult Scrabble
•A Bag of $20
•In a Gun Fight
•The 4th of July
•Rabbi advice
•Last Request
•a man and a shrink
•Casket comments
•Women and cats
•Politicians
•Six Items or less
•Owning a Candian
•Oles Testimony
•Texas taxi
•Morning Coffee
•News Article
•Ten years later
•Trust your Spouse
•The Window Seat
•13 burglar things
•Iranian Air Defense
Title: Truisms
| Have you ever noticed.... Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and > anyone going faster is a maniac? > * George Carlin > > The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the > second day you're off it. > * Jackie Gleason > > If not for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight. > * George Gobel > > Don't spend two dollars to dry clean a shirt. Donate it to the > Salvation Army instead. They'll clean it and put it on a hanger. Next > morning buy it back for seventy-five cents. > * Billiam Coronel > > Suppose you were an idiot; And suppose you were a member of congress. > But I repeat myself. > * Mark Twain > > Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At > least they can find Kuwait. > * A. Whitney Brown > > Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant? I'm halfway > through my fishburger and I realize, Oh my [Gosh]....I could be eating a > slow learner. > * Lynda Montgomery > > Why is it that when we talk to God we're said to be praying, but when God > talks to us we're schizophrenic? > * Lily Tomlin This joke is from the collection at www.usaone.net/jokenet |
