•Dog Food
•The Afghan Quarterback
•little Pill
•The Haircut
• DOG OF A ...
•Counseling
•As men age
•Exercise
•Employment Policy
•Jenny
•Marriage Humor 2
•Marriage Humor
•Pest Control
•Senility
•Brothel Trip
•Confession3
•Confession2
•Confession
•IRS Followup
•Hostess Bakery
•Invasion
•A Nun at Hooters
•The Mexican maid
•Cowboy Headstone
•blonde suicide
•Real laws of nature
•The man and the ostrich
•Newspaper
•Homeless Mans Funeral
•Adult Scrabble
•A Bag of $20
•In a Gun Fight
•The 4th of July
•Rabbi advice
•Last Request
•a man and a shrink
•Casket comments
•Women and cats
•Politicians
•Six Items or less
•Owning a Candian
•Oles Testimony
•Texas taxi
•Morning Coffee
•News Article
•Ten years later
•Trust your Spouse
•The Window Seat
•13 burglar things
•Iranian Air Defense
Title: Life Span
| On the first day, God created the cow. God said, "You must go to field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of 60 years." The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for 60 years. Let me have 20 years and I'll give back the other 40." So God agreed. On the second day, God created the monkey. God said, entertain people, do monkey tricks, make them laugh. I'll give you a 20 year life span." The monkey replied, "How boring, monkey tricks for 20 years? I don't think so. I'll give you back 10." And God agreed again. On the third day, God created the dog. God said, "Sit by the door of your house all day, and bark at anyone who walks past. I will give you a life span of 20 years." The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. The monkey gave you back 10, so that's what I'll do too, okay?" So God agreed. On the fourth day, God created man. God said, "Eat, sleep, play, have sex. Do nothing, just have fun. I'll give you 20 years." Man said, "What, only 20 years? No way! Tell you what, I'll take my 20, the 40 the cow gave back, the 10 the monkey gave back and the 10 the dog gave back. That makes 80 years, okay?" "Okay," said God. "You've got a deal." (sigh) So that is why: For the first 20 years, we eat, sleep, play, have sex, do nothing and have fun. For the next 40 years, we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next 10 years, we do monkey tricks to entertain our grandchildren. For the last 10 years, we sit in front of the house and bark at everybody. Life has now been explained! This joke is from the collection at www.usaone.net/jokenet |
